


dumb questions to ask a florist

by deceptivesoldier



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Bad Puns, Cheesy, Florist Bucky Barnes, M/M, Meet-Cute, Mentioned T'Challa/Sam Wilson, Post-Serum Steve Rogers, Valentine's Day Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-02-14
Updated: 2018-02-14
Packaged: 2019-03-18 12:05:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,835
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13681332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/deceptivesoldier/pseuds/deceptivesoldier
Summary: “If violets are blue, can’t you do something to cheer them up?”Steve gets that unimpressed eyebrow again. This time though, Steve can see the corner of Bucky’s lips trying to quirk up. He counts it as a win.“I haven’t been able to yet, but if you find a way be sure to come and let me know.”__or, the one where Bucky is a florist and Steve asks dumb questions.





	dumb questions to ask a florist

**Author's Note:**

> happy valentine's day!!
> 
> this fic was inspired by the twitter hashtag story I saw last night, [#StupidQuestionsForFlorists](https://twitter.com/i/moments/963546757861986312)
> 
> not betaed, because im impatient. all mistakes are mine. 
> 
> i hope you enjoy!

“Why can’t you just buy him a bouquet at the grocery store? Valentine’s day isn’t even today. It’s next _week._ ” 

Sam looks affronted. “If I showed up to Valentine’s day dinner with a bouquet from the _grocery store_ , T’Challa would kick my ass right to the curb. And I have to plan the arrangement in advance because flowers have _meanings,_ Steven.” 

Steve sighs, walking begrudgingly with Sam as they head to some flower shop Steve’s never heard of. He never really understood the hype over flowers. Or the hype over Valentine’s day. Steve’s a simple guy—soft blankets impress him, and those can cost just a few bucks. And don’t die after a week. Though, he does appreciate the gift February 15th gives him: half-priced chocolate and candy. 

He knows when they’ve reached the flower shop by the display of groups of red and pink flowers, which appear even brighter than they probably normally do thanks to the stark contrast of the black pots they’re in. Steve blinks—they’re definitely eye-catching. 

Sam stands outside for a moment, squinting his eyes at the pots and humming inquiringly to himself. 

Personally, Steve still thinks they look like the grocery store flowers, but he thinks Sam might slap him if he were to say that aloud. 

When Sam stands up, Steve follows him into the shop. Inside, they’re surrounded by all types and colors of flowers. There are small bouquets aligned on a staggered table right in front of them, large baskets of flowers hanging from the ceiling, display cases, the whole works. The flowers seem to be grouped together according to complimenting colors: light pinks and whites, oranges and reds. 

Steve is surprised when Sam bypasses everything and goes straight to the counter. 

Where, the man of Steve’s dreams is smiling brightly. 

His dark brown hair is tied back, but a few rebellious strands frame his face and accentuate his sharp jawline. He’s got tanned skin, surprisingly bright blue-grey eyes, and is only an inch or two shorter than Steve. 

“Welcome to _Oh, Snapdragon!_ I’m Bucky. How can I help you?” 

Steve stares stupidly, because the man of his dreams is a dork who likes puns. 

“Hey, Bucky. I’m Sam Wilson—I talked to you about putting together an arrangement?” Bucky beams. 

He and Sam chatter away about types of flowers and what they mean, what Sam wants to say with the arrangement, and the colors he’s looking for. Steve’s not really paying attention, because there’s another strand of Bucky’s hair about to fall out of the tie and Steve wants to reach out and tuck it behind his ear. 

Every now and then, Bucky’s eyes will slide over and meet Steve’s, who blushes at being caught looking. 

When Bucky and Sam finish up, Bucky claps once in success and Sam is grinning excitedly. 

“Great! I’ll have the bouquet ready for you to pick up on the afternoon of the 14th. Forewarning, it’s going to be pretty crazy in here,” Bucky smiles apologetically, “Is there anything else I can help you with?” At this, his gaze flickers over to Steve. 

Steve blinks owlishly. He sees a pot of roses behind Bucky. 

“Does every rose have its thorn?” 

Sam facepalms. Bucky raises an unimpressed eyebrow. 

“I’d say you’re welcome to check, but I don’t need you bleeding all over my roses.” 

Steve opens his mouth to try again, but Sam grabs at his shoulders and turns him around. “Thanks Bucky! See you next week!” 

Sam pushes Steve out of the shop. 

“You’re a dumbass.” 

“I’m going to charm the florist.” 

__ 

The next day, Steve decides his apartment could use some brightening up. So, he finds himself bypassing the grocery store and walking right back down to _Oh, Snapdragon!_ Behind the counter, Bucky stands up and welcomes him back in. There’s someone walking up to the counter, so Steve smiles back at him, and wanders aimlessly around the shop. 

His eyes catch on a small pot of purple flowers, which he picks up and nods definitively at. Turning around, Steve walks up to the counter. 

“You were here yesterday, weren’t you? I don’t think I caught your name.” 

“Steven. Rogers. Steve. Call me Steve.” Steve, smooth? Never. 

Bucky smirks. “So many names. Found something?” 

Steve nods jerkily and places the pot of flowers onto the counter. Bucky smiles again and starts to ring him up. There’s a moment of silence which Steve is desperate to break, so he says the first thing he can think of. 

“If violets are blue, can’t you do something to cheer them up?” 

Steve gets that unimpressed eyebrow again. This time though, Steve can see the corner of Bucky’s lips trying to quirk up. He counts it as a win. 

“I haven’t been able to yet, but if you find a way be sure to come and let me know.” Bucky slides the pot back to Steve, who clutches it in his hands. 

“I’ll do my best!” 

__ 

Steve finds himself with an excuse to go to the flower shop again a day later. In his defense, he had no idea his cat would want to eat the violets. Or that his cat _would_ eat the violets. But when Steve got home to find his cat sitting apathetically next to the knocked-over pot of flower stems, he couldn’t find it in himself to be disappointed. 

So he goes right back to the flower shop. He picks out another pot of flowers, and he walks up to Bucky at the counter. 

“Tulips, huh? No more violets?” 

Steve shrugs, smiling albeit a bit embarrassed. “Cat liked the violets a bit too much.” 

Bucky barks a laugh, an amused glint in his eyes. “Thats one of the truest struggles. Hopefully the tulips aren’t as appetizing.” Steve nods, pleased at the great start to this encounter with Bucky. Knowing the affinity Bucky has for puns—based on the name of his shop—Steve decides to try one. 

“Do you know what’d be the best lip balm for _my_ tu-lips?” 

Bucky’s eyes flicker down to Steve’s lips—and he does _not_ purse them—and he hums. 

“My favorite is Burt’s Bees, but I don’t think these need any,” Bucky says. He pushes the flowers to Steve along with the receipt. He smirks at Steve, completely aware Steve wasn’t talking about the flowers. 

The florist is currently the one charming _Steve._ Even though he’s apparently an ass. 

__

“Where did your love of flowers stem from?” 

“The soil which allowed it to grow.” 

__ 

At one point, Steve stopped trying to come up with excuses to come and see Bucky at the shop. He’ll come in and try to flirt with Bucky, who will be amused enough to give Steve sass, and then Steve will buy a flower. It’s a good rapport. 

Two days before Valentine’s day, Steve walks into the flower shop and Bucky isn’t the one behind the counter. Instead, it’s a petite redhead. She looks up and smiles politely at him. 

“Welcome to _Oh Snapdragon!_ , is there anything I can help you find?” 

In hindsight, Steve should have figured that Bucky wasn’t the _only_ one that worked in the shop. He didn’t. 

“Hi, uh, is Bucky here?” 

The woman analyzes him for a moment, and Steve shifts his weight uncomfortably onto the other foot. Then, she seems to place him, because her face clears and her eyebrows raise. 

“ _You’re_ the guy that asks Bucky all the dumb questions!” 

Steve furrows his brows. He feels a bit insulted. Bucky seemed happy to humor him. 

The redhead rolls her eyes. “Stop looking like I just kicked your puppy. If there was a list of the worst questions to ask a florist, all of yours would be on it. For some reason, Barnes loves when _you_ ask them.”

“He does?” 

The girl, her name tag proclaims her to be NATASHA, rolls her eyes. “I’ve been hearing about the _cute blond_ with the _cute flower_ questions ever since you showed up and asked him about roses having their thorn. Bucky’s been working here since the place opened. He’s heard the exact and similar variations of all these questions, but the sap claims it’s different when it’s you.” 

Steve kind of wants to bounce in excitement. 

“He’ll be back on Valentine’s day. He gets off at 7,” Natasha continues. Steve takes the hint. He thanks Natasha, buys a flower, and runs out the door. 

He’s going to get himself a Valentine. 

__

Steve drags Sam along with him on his Valentines day errands. 

“I never thought I’d see Steve Rogers frazzled out and trying to plan a Valentine’s date.” 

Steve sighs forlornly at the cleared out shelf where the chocolate roses were. There’s about a thousand people buzzing around them, all trying to scramble up a last-minute plan. Anything that was ever considered good has been cleared out, so all that remains are the gross candy kabobs. 

He turns his sad eyes onto Sam, who scowls at him. 

“The first thing you said to him was a Poison reference. Buy him a CD.” 

“Sam, you’re a genius.” 

Steve grabs Sam’s arm and leads them through the sea of people over to the CD section, where they find the Poison album Steve wanted. They make their way to checkout, and when they get back to Steve’s apartment, Sam claps him on the back. 

“Go get your Valentine, Steve,” he gives him a serious look, “Keep him, so I can get discounted flowers for the rest of my life.” 

__ 

At 6:58, Steve walks into the flower shop. 

The place looks like it was ransacked—it’s pretty much empty of all flowers. At the counter, Steve sees Bucky and Natasha resting their heads tiredly on their hands. When the door shuts behind Steve, Bucky appears to will himself to perk up, but the smile comes easy when his gaze lands on Steve. 

“Steve!” 

Blushing, Steve walks up to the counter. Bucky turns and scowls at Natasha, gesturing with his head for her to go into the back room. She doesn’t move, so Bucky sighs and turns back to Steve. 

“What can I do for ya? I don’t think I can do much, we’re kind out of … everything.” 

Steve hums. “You know, if you were a flower, I’d pick you.” 

Steve thinks he hears Natasha groan, but his eyes don’t stray from Bucky. 

“But since I’m not a flower?” 

“Will you be my Valentine?” Steve presents him with the Poison CD, which makes Natasha groan a bit louder. Bucky smiles and walks around the counter separating them and up to Steve. He takes the CD from Steve, probably standing closer than necessary to do so. Steve doesn’t mind. 

“Yeah,” he says softly, a smile in his voice. He tilts his head up to look at Steve. 

When they kiss, Steve decides Valentine’s day is much better than half-priced candy and chocolate day. At least now that he’s got the right Valentine. 

 

**Author's Note:**

> this is my second fic with a lot of bad puns so... sorry? lmao 
> 
> thanks for reading! :)
> 
> im on [tumblr](http://deceptivesoldier.tumblr.com)


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